Activated Guard troops here fight paperwork battle…

Activated Guard troops here fight paperwork battle first

Leave it to the Army to make being called up as unpleasant as possible. Well, these guys are Special Forces, I assume they have ways of dealing with this sort of thing.

Department of Inscrutable Puns It’s an invasion…

Department of Inscrutable Puns

It’s an invasion: Beetle ania

I get the reference, of course, but what’s an “ania”? Is it the plural of “anus”? Because if it is, it’s not the sort of thing you should talk about in a family newspaper.

High court okays gay-marriage bill Germany’s to…

High court okays gay-marriage bill

Germany’s top court says that gay marriage is okay, though they won’t decide if they’re fully equivalent to hetero marriage yet. Of course, they got bills through the Bundestag to that effect. Can you imagine a bill like that even getting a vote in the US? This is one of those things the Euros are right on, and we’re wrong.

Not the band, that would be inhumane

Poison chosen to rout snakeheads

Sure, but they’re canny. You might try to poison them, but it might just give them the push they need to make a run for it.

Hollywood Fertilizes Profits with Crop Circles …

Hollywood Fertilizes Profits with Crop Circles

Does anyone but me find it unusually obtuse, even by Hollywood standards, to make a movie centering around a “phenomenon” long revealed as a hoax?

Apparently I’m not alone in dreaming I’m in high s…

Apparently I’m not alone in dreaming I’m in high school. (Oddly, when I was in high school, I almost never remembered my dreams.) A couple of posters have mentioned the closely related “Oh my God, I forgot I have a final” dream, another classic. I have that one too, and even though it’s more of a college thing to miss a final, I’m always in high school.

When I was in college, I actually forgot I had a final until the last minute. Dead serious — sophomore year, British Literature since 1650. I remembered at the last minute, drove to campus, found a spot, hurried to the class, knowing I was going to fail because I hadn’t done any of the reading… And the professor, a positive saint even though I’ve forgotten his name, told us that we didn’t have to take the exam and we could take the grade we already had. (This has never happened to me since.) He handed out slips with our grades, mine said “B”, and I have never run so fast in my life before or since.

Ananova – Birthday card reveals death threat Oh…

Ananova – Birthday card reveals death threat

Oh, sure, the company is treating this as a joke from someone at the factory. But have they thought that maybe it’s serious? Someone could be out to kill Alexander Fowler, Age 12, and the authorities are letting it slide!

Delaware program requires farmers to keep track of…

Delaware program requires farmers to keep track of animal waste, fertilizer – 7/19/2002 – ENN.com

Remember to keep a detailed log of all animal poop on your farm, boys!

Well, that’s not really what it’s about, but that’s what it sounds like. It’s really about the fertilizer and controlling runoff.

Norway Resumes Whaling Norway and Japan seem to…

Norway Resumes Whaling

Norway and Japan seem to be having some sort of contest to see who can be the biggest ass about this.

CNN.com – Suit challenges airline ID requirements …

CNN.com – Suit challenges airline ID requirements – July 19, 2002

I’m not crazy about all of the new flying rules myself. However, I don’t think there’s anything at all wrong with requiring ID to get on a plane, and John Gilmore has reached the Naderian level of self-parody right on schedule.