The tour goes on

Ousted Alabama judge to speak – mansfieldnewsjournal.com

Two weeks from now in Ashland, Ohio, on the campus of Ashland University. Tickets are on sale now for $10 at Buehler’s, The Carpenter’s Shop and Cates Chiropractic. Why are chiropractors selling tickets to a speech? Good question.

Get thee behind me, media!

Forbes.com: Ex-HealthSouth CEO hosts TV show as trial looms

I haven’t gotten to see the Richard Scrushy Show (not its real name) and probably won’t be able to watch the tape until tomorrow. But initial reviews indicate that it’s the hoot I was expecting. First, he compared the media to Satan; then he brought out Roy Moore. You can’t make this stuff up. Saturday Night Live should be this creative.

I should point out that WTTO-21 in Birmingham is not producing this show and has nothing to do with the content. It’s basically an informercial; the station GM compares Scrushy to Ron Popeil. (There was one commercial, for a bank owned by Scrushy attorney Donald Watkins, backing up my theory that Watkins is the Svengali and money man for this.) Scrushy bought the early-morning half hour for a year in advance. I don’t know what happens when he goes to jail this summer. Says UA law professor Kenneth Rosen, “It is unusual for someone under indictment to have a TV program.”

Tuscaloosa finally enters the sixties

BREAKING NEWS: Students stage walkout to protest proposed Central High location

Students at Tuscaloosa’s Central High School walked out today because they’re upset that the school board wants to build a replacement school in the middle of nowhere rather than in the heart of the city like the current school. Shouldn’t Central High School be, you know, Central?

Funny how that works

The Miami Herald | 03/01/2004 | FCAT scores up at schools with good libraries, study shows

Gosh, if you have a lot of good books in a school library, the kids do better on the tests. So the Jebite government in Tallahassee has kept spending levels for school library materials the same since 2000 and wants to keep them the same on the current budget, too. Heck, the Bushes never needed to read any books to get ahead. Kids are just spoiled.

How to watch the Oscars

1. Set your VCR or DVR.

2. Go to sleep early Sunday night.

3. Get up early in the morning and watch the recording. This way you can fast forward through commercials, Sting songs, Billy Crystal’s more unfunny moments, speeches by foreigners you’ve never heard of, etc. Whole thing lasts about 90 minutes this way.

Endorsed by the Militia of Montana

Constitution Party hopes for Moore candidacy

The more I hear about the incredibly-misnamed Constitution Party, the more I think they may be too crazy even for Roy Moore. We’ve had a lot of crazy fringe political parties over the years, but these guys make the Natural Law Party and the Pat Buchanan-era Reform Party look sane.

Anyway, time is apparently running out for St. Roy to make his decision. The Alabama head of the CP now is talking about Moore running for governor for them in 2006, which is not going to happen; if he runs for governor it will be as a Republican.

Even crazier news from the CP; the party’s founder is pushing a petition to get Bush to nominate Moore to the Supreme Court! The U.S. Supreme Court! Can you imagine! He better hurry, because W.’s going to be out in ten months.

Good news, bad news, for Bush & Cheney

CNN.com – Gas prices up nearly 7 cents – Feb. 29, 2004

The bad news is that this is yet another blow to their reelection chances. The good news is that their portfolios are doing well.

That’s it, we’re done?

Return of the King isn’t going to win any more awards? I’m happy, of course, but I thought I’d share this:

New Zealand News – Entertainment – The Return of the King rules them all

“It’s win marks the greatest achievement in local cinema history.”

You think? I’m kind of worried about New Zealand now. They’ve apparently got an entirely film-based economy now and if Jackson doesn’t get King Kong ramped up quickly there’ll probably be a depression.

UPDATE: I just saw the typo in the quote. “It’s” is in the original. Maybe that’s NZ English.