Really, he’s crazy

Birmingham Mayor Larry Langford hires 13-year-old Raven Hatcher as park consultant – al.com

This isn’t some certificate. He gave her a contract. For $10,000.

Past tense, people

Student wrecks car on snowy road, disappears – CNN.com

As in “wrecked”, “disappeared”. Did we mention that this happened four years ago? And that this is the lead story on CNN.com? Jesus, it’s not like there isn’t enough real news right now.

You know what this means?

Tiny northern owl found over Alabama – al.com

Turduckenowl!

Apparently the Dukes of Hazzard are in town

Car chased by deputies after report of robbery rams deputies’ vehicle; 3 captured – al.com
Injured Jasper police officers recovering from crash – al.com
Birmingham officers injured after pursuit ends in wreck – Breaking News from The Birmingham News – al.com

Republicans, meanwhile, want to know how poor people are able to buy food

Alabama House Democrats say ending grocery tax is top priority – al.com

No, actually, they’re whining that if you change the income tax (removing the ability to deduct for federal income tax) that rich people would pay more. This is obviously unfair. I mean, if rich people were paying more taxes, that would mean that they might not be able to afford that fourth car or something. But if you don’t do this, then a state that’s already facing a budget crunch would see a whole lot of tax dollars go away. So nothing is going to happen.

Thanks, guys!

Alabama Power plant nation’s worst for mercury | TuscaloosaNews.com | The Tuscaloosa News | Tuscaloosa, AL

What with being downriver and all, I really enjoy that you’re sending mercury into the atmosphere. Well, at least we’re upwind.

You have to be kidding me

It’s North vs. South in Big Three bailout fight – Capitol Hill- msnbc.com

So we’re going to complain about having tax money getting sent up North? Because the basic fact is that for many, many years, the South has been a net drain on the Federal purse. Michigan, on the other hand, has usually been a net loser. And while $25 billion is a whole lot of money, in terms of the United States government, it’s a drop in the bucket. Well, three or four drops.

Richard Shelby, of all people, is going around complaining about this. Shelby complaining about Federal money getting spent is like Ron Jeremy preaching abstinence.

Nice wig, Georgie Boy

Jason Alexander has a criminal mind – Los Angeles Times

Either that, or he’s the lead in The Sir Isaac Newton Story.

A doomed endeavor

Alabama Republicans say it’s time for soul-searching – al.com

You’ll never find anything that small.

Great, racists

Racial slur, threat against Obama at UA – Breaking News from The Birmingham News – al.com

I got an email last week from the Provost condemning the tearing down of a poster and a graffiti slur against a political candidate. No further details. Turns out that the candidate was (surprise!) Barack Obama, and that the slur was (surprise!) racial.

The only thing that actually surprised me was that it was at the College of Communication. I figured it would be History, which has traditionally been crawling with neo-Confederates.