Daily Archives: February 2, 2004

Degrading reality shows of the week

Yahoo! News – GENDER BEND & LOVE

UPN brings us Awfully Pretty, in which “a group of men who are transformed into women by their wives or girlfriends.” Make your own joke there. The men are forced to live as women 24 hours a day and share a house. I can see it now:

8:00 UPN: AWFULLY PRETTY: Bob decides that he enjoys being a girl. (Last show of the series.)

And the ever-family-friendly Fox is coming out — oops, Freudian! — with Playing It Straight, a dating show in which a woman chooses from a pool of single men, some of whom are gay. I’ve heard about that one before; it sounds like the usual Fox fare.

Steven + Dubya 4eva

USS Clueless – What didn’t happen

The biggest story was the one we didn’t read: “Terrorist attack causes 30,000 deaths”. It is the deafening silence, the dog not barking in the night. For the third straight year since 9/11, a crowd the size of a small city concentrated itself in a stadium and sat for several hours to watch the most heavily televised live event of the year. And then that crowd dispersed and went home.

Wow. Just like the 35 Super Bowls before 9-11! And the hundreds of NFL games every year! And the thousands of college football games! And Major League Baseball, and the NBA, and college basketball, and hockey, if they’re still playing that. And tennis matches, and golf tournaments, and horse racing, and boxing, and every other sporting event.

To my offhand knowledge, no American sporting event has ever been struck by terrorists. There was the Olympic park bombing carried out by Eric Rudolph, but that wasn’t at the actual sports venue. (And Rudolph’s not the kind of terrorist SDB is usually worried about, anyway.)

Thank goodness the Bush gang is in the White House where they can boldly not have something happen that’s never happened outside the movies.

(Anyway, if I were a terrorist, I wouldn’t attack the Super Bowl. Leaving aside the security — which hasn’t really changed in recent years, by the way — even in a domed stadium it’s usually a fairly open area where mass fatalities are relatively unlikely. An enclosed arena would be a better bet.)

More Simpsons

Alex and I are thrashing this out…

Karl Rove definitely = Mr. Burns. To be honest, I’m sure I’ve seen that before.
Therefore, Andy Card = Smithers
Cheney = Barney? Maybe.
Colin Powell = Dr. Hibbert
Ralph Nader = Disco Stu
Trent Lott = Cletus

Doom now imminent

CNN.com – WHO: Human bird flu link possible – Feb. 1, 2004

It’s happened. Maybe. Two Vietnamese women who recently died of bird flu may — may — have caught it from their brother. Some human-to-human transmission is always possible, but if the virus mutates and this becomes common, we’re looking at a pandemic.

The poop

Ban on poultry litter in feed could drive up cattle costs

Bet you didn’t know they fed cows chicken poop and feathers! It’s mixed in with spilled feed and some producers say they save money this way. Hey, they could save money by sending cows dumpster diving, but they don’t do that, do they? Do they?

The Feds are banning the practice to fight mad cow disease, but not bird flu, if you were wondering.

Let me get this straight

SI.com – CBS apologizes for halftime breast-baring – Sunday February 1, 2004 11:13PM

“We were extremely disappointed by elements of the MTV-produced halftime show,” Joe Browne, NFL executive vice president, said. “They were totally inconsistent with assurances our office was given about the content of the show.”

You knew MTV was producing. And you knew Kid Rock and P. Diddy would be involved. And yet, you were disappointed by elements of the halftime show because of Janet’s boob? I think you need to reexamine your priorities.

Pork lite

Some cuts for area, but not as grim as some expected

The Mobile area was worried that when powerful congressman Sonny Callahan retired, they’d lose all their pork. Well, I’m happy to say that you, the American taxpayer, are still indulging the area, if not quite as much as before.