City in Chains

Residents fight for their beloved city- al.com

Words emblazoned on the glass door of the Lipscomb City Hall describe the west Jefferson County city as “A City of Change.”

I’d like to say that when I first scanned this, I read that as “City of Charges”. I mean, you guys can fight all you want, but you elected these bums. The ones on the city council, anyway. Nobody ever seems to finish a term as mayor.

Anyway, some people have gotten so desperate that they want to unincorporate, or even — get this — merge with Birmingham or even Bessemer. That is bad.

Um…

Fewer gents than ladies vow `I do’ in the U.S.- al.com

Okay… gay marriage is illegal, right?

Just for that?

Lipscomb mayor resigns – Breaking News from The Birmingham News – al.com

No! I mean, just because he wasn’t, technically, allowed to be mayor after his burglary conviction? Unfair!

Gaston Randle, multiple felony defendant, is mayor pro tem. According to the Bessemer DA, he can be mayor until he’s convicted:

“It won’t affect him unless he is convicted,” Green said. “He’s not guilty until he is proven guilty. That’s the way it is.”

Yeah. Is it okay if I convict him in the unregulated world of petty online media?

Of course not

Jury: Drummond not liable in slayings – Breaking News from The Birmingham News – al.com

Kill all the union organizers you want, especially if they’re in Latin America. No problem!

Oh, no, hos!

Residents target Lacey’s Spring spas- al.com

Residents claim that two “spas” are actually brothels, and they’re all riled up about it. It’s all to protect the children, of course.

No delay! Kill now!

Activists ask delay in Grayson execution so DNA tests can be done- al.com

So I figured that “Troy King” would have something to say about this, because if they delay the execution his bloodlust will not be slaked. No disappointment there. His statement reads, in part, “Grayson confessed three times to the grizzly (sic) details of the murder before his trial.” Wait, he’s a bear? Bears don’t have rights!

Bad lawyer! Bad!

Employee punished for buying alcohol in city car- al.com

Apparently, there’s a rule against carrying alcohol in Birmingham city-owned vehicles, even when they’re being used for private purposes. Apparently, an assistant city attorney was driving, probably driving home, in a city-owned car. Some city attorneys do this. And he stopped by a (state-owned) liquor store to pick up some booze. This offended a local busybody, who called a professional local busybody who has a radio show and is very proud of himself.

Awkward!

Assistant DA resigns after shoplifting arrest- al.com

A Shelby County ADA had to resign after stealing $70 worth of energy bars from a Wal-Mart. “Troy King” has been asked to appoint a special prosecutor, possibly because the former ADA was the one responsible for prosecuting shoplifting.

They did it on spec

Drummond exec. denies paying for murders of Colombian union leaders – NewsFlash – al.com

He knows his audience

Thompson set to raise funds in Mountain Brook- al.com

In the 2008 presidential race, there are two separate but equally plutocratic groups: the Republican presidential candidates who ask for money, and the Brookies who give it to them. This is their story.