Category Archives: Posts Where I Am Obviously Joking

The Fell Winter of 2010

There is water on the roads, but this is no ordinary water. No, this is melted snow, and it will use its dark powers to make us all run out of milk and bread. Soon, wolves will cross the frozen Black Warrior and feast on our frozen corpses. The snow is, of course, positive proof that there is no such thing as global warming.

You know what this means

Calera, Alabaster and Helena among the best 100 places to live, according to Money magazine – al.com

There really aren’t very many good places to live. Alabaster, really?

Who’s the dummy?

Illiteracy declines in 66 of Alabama’s 67 counties – al.com

It’s Morgan County, which rose to 20 percent illiteracy! Someone tell the people in Morgan County about this.

In this case, I have to believe the Kremlin

AFP: Mamma Mia! Putin denies mystery ABBA concert

A former American President — I forget his name — said that he looked into Putin’s soul. And if there’s one thing I know about ABBA, it’s that they never had any soul.

Larry King, you’ve done it again!

110-year-old ‘living fossil’ becomes a dad – CNN.com

McCain campaign tied to Scrushy!

HealthSouth recovers $133 million in suit against investment vbank [sic] UBS – al.com

So, UBS, which helped Richard Scrushy in his massive fraud against the shareholders of HealthSouth and the people of the United States of America, has to pay $100 million and forgive $33 million in “debt”. UBS’ vice chairman is Phil Gramm, John McCain’s top economics man. Under the McCain Rules, this means that Gramm is guilty by association. When will John McCain condemn Phil Gramm for his fraud against HealthSouth shareholders?

Well, that does it

20bn barrel oil discovery puts Cuba in the big league | World news | The Guardian

We’re going to have to invade them again. Bay of Pigs II: This Time, It’s Personal, Because We Need the Oil.

Barbaric

Verner Elementary partakes in ‘Walk to School’ day | TuscaloosaNews.com | The Tuscaloosa News | Tuscaloosa, AL

What are we, cavemen? Some of these people walked as much as a mile!

Trash talk

Petroleum exec says governor should cancel Georgia-Alabama football game to save gas | Political Insider

They ought to cancel it to save Georgia’s ass.

As long as they look at my proposal, I’m happy

Architectural search committee to analyze design proposals for Birmingham’s domed stadium – al.com

I am not adverse to kickbacks, if that’s what it takes.