Category Archives: Ursipundit

No delay! Kill now!

Activists ask delay in Grayson execution so DNA tests can be done-

So I figured that “Troy King” would have something to say about this, because if they delay the execution his bloodlust will not be slaked. No disappointment there. His statement reads, in part, “Grayson confessed three times to the grizzly (sic) details of the murder before his trial.” Wait, he’s a bear? Bears don’t have rights!

They’re just going to blow it all on salmon anyway

Grizzlies, wolves could get trust fund –

Man, first those crazy ladies keep leaving all their money to their cats, now this.

Born to eat wild

Weston restaurant owner charged with buying wild meat

The owner of the “Pacific Island” restaurant purchased wild ducks, white-tailed deer, bear and snook from undercover agents of the Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission. I don’t know what “snook” are but I’m guessing it’s a fish which would mean that this goes in all three “pundit” categories.

The defendant says that he didn’t feed any of this to his patrons, and that it was only used to feed his employees. Uh-huh.

(Offensive and overly intrusive registration required. Better use email address mac at warliberal dot com, password warliberal.)

Is the attention really good for that?

ABC 7 News – April Declared Panda Month at National Zoo

Apparently in order to encourage mating, April is “Panda Month” in Washington. As opposed to “Pander Month”, which, as you know, is pretty much every month.

I’m sorry, I’ll try to do better.

Space bears! – Polar bears at Singapore Zoo turn green – Feb. 25, 2004

As you may or may not know, the white color of polar bears results from hair that is actually hollow and mostly transparent. The hair of the two Singapore bears has algae growing in the shafts, leading to a kind of forest green look. This is what happens when you raise polar bears in the tropics. (It happened in San Diego in ’79.)

So, what do you do when you want to lighten a polar bear’s hair? Use peroxide, of course.

The insurrection goes mainstream

I don’t drink Pepsi, but I have to give them credit for their bear home-invasion commercial.

Rare bear – Alaska protects one rare white bear – August 24, 2002

It’s a black bear, but it’s white. So it’s under special protection, an emergency regulation passed yesterday.

Tourist trap – Don’t see Greenland for its polar bears – April 23, 2002

Tip for travel agents: tell your customers that they should go to see the penguins. They’re tourists, they won’t know that penguins are Antarctic.

Ketchup Packet Bear

Ketchup Packet Bear

Uh… OK.

If you’re going to put together a giant ketchup-packet bear to shoot at, the least you can do is get a real gun. I mean, a BB gun? That’s just sad.

(Via Pop Culture Junk Mail, again.)